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paixaorpg2006-09-16 09:21 pm
prinzessinasuka.livejournal.com) wrote in paixaorpg2006-09-16 09:21 pm
Entry tags:
Her Madness Keeps Her Sane? [completed]
Character(s): Asuka, Rei and anyone.
Content: Asuka is messed up after Kyoko's disappearance and Rei is at the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person.
Setting: Around Vanaheim gate (F3)
Time: Afternoon, Week 2
Warnings: Insanity.
The warmth is gone. Asuka brings her arms around herself, thinking that maybe she can gather the warmth that was once in front of her if she does that. The warmth is still not here. She lets go of herself and repeats the gesture; reaching her hands out and bringing them around herself yet again. "Mama?" She asks timidly, afraid that if she calls out too loud, her mother will not come to her; that if she demands too much, they would not give her anything and will take away everything she has.
She feels so fragile that she is afraid that if she speaks too loud then she might break herself. Yet in her mind, her own voice echoes like stereos set on full blast but she cannot make herself shut up. She can hear herself yelling over and over again like a broken record, BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! BAKABAKABAKA!! but that is not her, that is the Bad Asuka and the Good Asuka is whimpering in the background, no foreground, BACKGROUND, YOU BAKA! but then she realizes that there is no Good Asuka or Bad Asuka, there is only Strong Asuka and Weak Asuka and now the Strong Asuka is angry, ohpleaseplease, stop shouting, damnit!, and she is the Weak Asuka and she is so weak she can only cry.
Asuka gathers her knees around her to make up for the warmth that was once there but is not anymore. She puts her hands on her ears to make the Strong Asuka stop shouting mean things to her, but it only made Strong Asuka sound louder in her head. Tears flow down from her eyes that gaze into the distant nothingness, synchrographminus twelvepoint eightit's on theborderline ofthestartingindicator. "Stop it..." Her eyes dart around chaoticly, looking for an enemy, the enemy. She is looking for the source of the voice so she can destroy him, her, it. So it would shutupshutupshutup.
Her eyes fall upon Rei and she grins like a madman (man? girl, madgirl). you arejust adolllike i thoughtyou'vealwayslooked likeadoll andi'vehated youfor a longlongtime! haah!ihate everyoneeveryone! "I hate you..." she mutter menacingly to Rei. "ihateyouihateyouihateyou..." she repeats the words like a mantra, biting her nails nervously while glaring at Rei. she's justadollcan't feelangrysadhurt so shecansaywhatever shewantsto it. "You're just my doll~" she says in a sing-song voice to Rei.
Content: Asuka is messed up after Kyoko's disappearance and Rei is at the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person.
Setting: Around Vanaheim gate (F3)
Time: Afternoon, Week 2
Warnings: Insanity.
The warmth is gone. Asuka brings her arms around herself, thinking that maybe she can gather the warmth that was once in front of her if she does that. The warmth is still not here. She lets go of herself and repeats the gesture; reaching her hands out and bringing them around herself yet again. "Mama?" She asks timidly, afraid that if she calls out too loud, her mother will not come to her; that if she demands too much, they would not give her anything and will take away everything she has.
She feels so fragile that she is afraid that if she speaks too loud then she might break herself. Yet in her mind, her own voice echoes like stereos set on full blast but she cannot make herself shut up. She can hear herself yelling over and over again like a broken record, BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! BAKABAKABAKA!! but that is not her, that is the Bad Asuka and the Good Asuka is whimpering in the background, no foreground, BACKGROUND, YOU BAKA! but then she realizes that there is no Good Asuka or Bad Asuka, there is only Strong Asuka and Weak Asuka and now the Strong Asuka is angry, ohpleaseplease, stop shouting, damnit!, and she is the Weak Asuka and she is so weak she can only cry.
Asuka gathers her knees around her to make up for the warmth that was once there but is not anymore. She puts her hands on her ears to make the Strong Asuka stop shouting mean things to her, but it only made Strong Asuka sound louder in her head. Tears flow down from her eyes that gaze into the distant nothingness, synchrographminus twelvepoint eightit's on theborderline ofthestartingindicator. "Stop it..." Her eyes dart around chaoticly, looking for an enemy, the enemy. She is looking for the source of the voice so she can destroy him, her, it. So it would shutupshutupshutup.
Her eyes fall upon Rei and she grins like a madman (man? girl, madgirl). you arejust adolllike i thoughtyou'vealwayslooked likeadoll andi'vehated youfor a longlongtime! haah!ihate everyoneeveryone! "I hate you..." she mutter menacingly to Rei. "ihateyouihateyouihateyou..." she repeats the words like a mantra, biting her nails nervously while glaring at Rei. she's justadollcan't feelangrysadhurt so shecansaywhatever shewantsto it. "You're just my doll~" she says in a sing-song voice to Rei.
no subject
"I obey the Commander," Rei found herself stating between whimpers of pain as she tried to twist around to face the Second without dislocating her shoulder. This was the situation she had been worried about.
Part of her wished Death were still around.
She wanted to break free somehow and perhaps try to run, but she knew she would not make it very far at all. Rei simply said nothing, ignoring the pain as best as she could and looking calmly back at the Second. There had to be a way to... to what? Rei's eyes drifted to the side.
She remembered she did not like the color red.
no subject
Noticing that Rei seems desperate to get away from her, Asuka lets go of the grip she has on the other girl's shoulder. Contrary to what she just said moments ago, she pushes the blue-haired girl away from her. "Leave if you want!" She spits out to Rei's face. "You can't survive here without me," she sneers at the First to cover the anxiety she feels within. "You'll die if you don't do what I say!" She yells at Rei, sounding more desperate for Rei to stay with her than angry.
Asuka does not want Rei to leave, she cannot have anyone leave her anymore. Too many people have left her behind, she does not think she can handle it if anyone were to leave again. But if Asuka does want Rei to leave then it would feel less painful if Rei does leave, because then she would have wanted it, right? right?? It wouldn't hurt so much, right?