paixaorpg | Stuck With The Weird [complete]

Entry tags:

Stuck With The Weird [complete]

Character(s): The Prince, Dante
Content: Dante is drafted for babysitting duty. Imagine the extreme joy Dante feels.
Setting: A restaurant near N8 and moves along to Matinal's.
Time: week 2, evening
Warnings: None yet

Dante nearly threw his journal across the room when he read Jenet’s little note.

She was going out drinking. Okay, that was cool. Dante appreciated a few good drinks every now and then, and never objected to someone going out to have a good time. He did that pretty often himself. Sometimes he’d go with Trish, and other times he’d leave the office in her hands and go get plastered on his own.

That wasn’t the part he objected to. Not at all.

Jenet was going to a bar. Children were not allowed at bars. Jenet’s pint-sized friend was a child.

She was leaving the strange…kid…thing with him. As in his care. He’d be responsible for the little tyke. He’d have to make sure he ate all his meals and was tucked into bed at a reasonable hour.

What had Dante ever done to show Jenet that he was a kid person????!!!! One could imagine the indignity that resulted from such an implication.

“Jenet, the next time I see you, I’m going to owe you a lot more than a drink!” he yelled at the journal screen, among other choice words. She may have been hot, but she just stiffed him! This was going to be one of the worst nights ever! The kid was weird. Dante could handle weird most nights. On a good, sober night, maybe even kid. But not both. Not at once.

Dante imagined the Prince’s sunny smile and rambling sentences, and almost snapped his journal in half.

They had been in a restaurant. Had been, as in the manager had come over to their table and quietly asked them to leave. Now Dante was stalking outside the building, pacing back and forth, swearing his head off. He didn’t care if Prince heard him or not. He was pissed, and everyone was going to hear about it.

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The Prince had come to the conclusion that Dante was a very strange person (and of course failed to see the irony in this assessment). For starters, Dante was exibiating strange behavior. Exibiating was a very good word! The Prince thought that he really must use it more often. What was he thinking about again? Oh yes, this strange behavior that Dante was exibiating.

Dante was walking first one way, turning, and then walking the other. Then he would turn around and repeat the process all over again! The Prince was enjoying just watching Dante walk back and forth again, and again, and again. Maybe it was some sort of game! The Prince decided to join in, walking behind Dante. First one way, then the other, and repeat. It was probably only a matter of time before Dante noticed him.

He was also shouting all of these words The Prince had never heard before! The Prince would have to try those some time. After all, Dante seemed to enjoy them.

But where was Queen Jenet? The Prince had hoped they were meeting up with her, but so far no luck. He remembered Dante saying something about her (he owed her something!) so The Prince assumed that Dante would know.

"Where's Queen Jenet?"

In the middle of a rant about how he should have known not to trust a pirate, even though those things weren’t real, and the only remnant of them were obsessed cosplayers, Dante heard Prince’s question. He stopped pacing so he could answer the Prince. He looked around, expecting to see the Prince waiting under the awning of the restaurant like a good kid, and was surprised to see the kid had been following him around! For how long??? Already trying his patience, eh? No matter.

Dante glared down at the Prince. “She could be in hell for all I care,” he snapped, crossing his arms tightly over his chest. “But you know where she went? She went to escape you. She went to go drink strong drinks so she won’t remember you tomorrow. And she left you with me. Got it, kid? You gotta listen to me, or I’ll leave you by yourself in the worst part of town.”

The Prince took back what he had said (thought?) before. Dante wasn't just strange; he was a crazy, mean old man! The Prince shrunk away from him, tears already forming in his eyes. "Queen Jenet wouldn't do that, not to The Prince!" His lips pulled into a tight line as he tried to keep his crying at bay. It gave him the look of a strange combination of anger, sadness, and constipation.

As he looked up at Dante's face, The Prince was beginning to think that maybe being left by himself wouldn't be nearly as bad as being left with Dante. But he quickly remembered the last time he had been left alone, which hadn't been pleasant at all. "The Prince will do what you say! Just don't leave him alone!" He didn't stop the tears from falling now, instead pulling his hat over his face to hide them.

Dante kept his glare fixed firmly on the Prince. He had the reaction Dante expected him to: he crumbled. Thoroughly.

In fact, so thoroughly, that it drew attention.

People walked past them to get into the restaurant, giving the pair a wide berth. Most gave Dante condescending looks, or even scolded him with their eyes. Who could make such a sweet kid cry? How heartless! The best part was that most of them likely assumed that Dante was the kid’s guardian. Or parent, even. Which was bad. Totally not a good way to get with chicks. Baggage was a turn-off. He should know!

Dante’s glare changed to a look of annoyance. The kid was making a scene! “Come on, Prince. Stop crying already,” he ordered in a whisper. He wanted to add on, You’re making me look bad! but he didn’t. He chewed on his lip some as he glanced around. People were whispering now. This wouldn’t do.

Getting these next words from Dante was like trying to get a drink of water from a long dry, rusted spigot. Next to impossible, but he caved in. He grit his teeth to hold back the words, but they came anyway. “I won’t leave you, Prince,” Dante said tightly. Though I claim the pleasure of dumping you back in Jenet’s lap later. “You can stay with me if you can keep up.” Immediately he turned and headed off at a brisk walk down the road towards the city center and entertainment.

The Prince was too absorbed in his crying to notice the people staring at them. Even Dante's stern order was not enough to stop him. Just then The Prince heard something quite different coming from Dante. Even though the attitude was still the same, the words themselves sounded beautiful to The Prince's ears.

He perked up considerably when it seemed that he would not be left behind. He rewarded Dante by swallowing one last cry and following after him. The Prince soon found that with his short legs he would no be able to keep up with Dante's stride. He jogged to catch up with Dante, before returning to a slow-paced walk. He was afraid to get too close for fear that Dante would lash out at him again. Presently, he began to lag behind again and had to run to catch up. So it repeated in this way.

The Prince wanted to ask Dante where they were going, but past experiences told him not to. See, The Prince could learn something! Still, he really did want to know. What if Dante was actually going to leave him somewhere in "the worst part of town?" That would be awful!

Dante wasn’t in the greatest of moods already. He knew of many people who’d think he’d gone soft if they found out about this little adventure. The great, mighty demon hunter, watching a helpless child in a strange town. That definitely fit his badass image. Anyone with half a brain would have left the kid there alone to give him a quick lesson in maturity. Anyone else would have thrown away the drain on time and money that this kid was. They’d say, “Grow some balls, kid!” and take off.

Unfortunately, Dante wasn’t like that. Not at the moment, anyway.

Maybe this will be a learning experience, Dante thought as he walked. He was walking fast in hopes the Prince wouldn’t be able to keep up. He was not used to optimism. Maybe I’ll get something out of it besides a headache.

Dante was leading The Prince through the busy Joutenheim area towards central Paixao. They needed to find some entertainment – or at least, Dante very badly needed to be entertained.

Wait, Dante thought, after hearing the Prince’s steps trail behind him for the fiftieth time. If he tires out too quickly, I’ll have to carry him. And I don’t want that. Who knows where he’s been. So he stopped walking until the Prince caught up with him.

“Jenet didn’t abandon you,” he reluctantly said to the Prince, allowing that one bit of kindness to peek out again. The tears didn’t make him feel badly, nor did the stares. Maybe it was a little bit of memory. “She’ll be back later.”

The Prince had been having an even harder time keeping up with Dante in the crowd. He was surprised when he saw Dante stop. Did he want The Prince to catch up? In any case, The Prince took it to mean that and quickly ran up to Dante's side.

He still didn't look at Dante, (well, maybe he had one or two peeks. Or more.) instead looking ahead at where they were going. The Prince couldn't yet figure out where they were headed, but with all the walking they were doing they were bound to be going somewhere! Somewhere was better than nowhere in The Prince’s opinion.

The Prince's smile had begun to come back, and it widened all the more when Dante talked about Jenet. "The Prince knows!" he said, giving Dante a full smile, "Because Queen Jenet is a good person." And maybe Dante was a good person too. Maybe.

What faith this kid had! Too bad it was faith in a pirate. And that was definitely faith misplaced. Well. Even if she really wasn’t a pirate, it was obvious she couldn’t be trusted for much, except for getting drunk. Dante simply smiled thinly and turned away. “She doesn’t deserve you, kid,” he commented under his breath, starting off down the street at a much slower pace so the Prince could keep up. The Prince was either very stupid or very naïve. He couldn’t decide. Well, he couldn’t expect much from a person who kept speaking in third person anyway.

The streets were still plenty busy for this time of day. Dante was able to walk pretty easily, though. People didn’t want to cross him or even near him for the very good reason he had strapped across his back. He knew the pair of them made an odd couple, and they certainly got the odd stares to go with it. Big hunter, little kid – not two who usually went together most days.

Soon their little excursion led them near a building that could only be described as a grocery store. Or the closest approximation to one that the city had to offer. Dante had to give it a double take. It looked much more like an old-fashioned marketplace. Hmm. Maybe they could investigate. They probably wouldn’t have much, but food was food.

“Hey, Prince, you still hungry?” He probably was. At least Dante was, anyway. Their meal had been interrupted by Dante’s little meltdown. “I’ll get you something here. You know. To make up for getting us kicked out of the restaurant.”

Sure, The Prince was oblivious to most things, but he did notice that Dante had slowed down considerably. Since Dante had been in such a hurry before, The Prince assumed it was for his benefit. While he was pondering this, he didn't notice what Dante mumbled under his breath. The Prince was oblivious to most things, after all.

It was rather nice that there was a path for them to walk through easily, although The Prince couldn't understand why people kept their distance. Dante didn't strike him as very imposing, at least after he had gotten over the fear of being left behind. The Prince was getting used to strange company.

The Prince spotted the marketplace soon after Dante did, and was already running over to it when Dante asked him if he was hungry. "Yes, The Prince is most hungry!" he called back, stopping near a section of fruits. It wasn't The Prince's favorite (he liked fried foods!), but the fruits did look awfully good. Despite being engaged in his appraisal of the fruits, he was able to catch Dante's last sentence. "Kicked out? Is that why the stuttering man came over?"

Just what was it, exactly, that had made Dante think bringing a high-energy child to a marketplace with exposed food was a good idea? Even he had to stop and think about it. First of all, he hated kids, so why was he being nice to one, and feeding it, no less? Why was he reassuring it and being somewhat kind and making up for his crappy attitude earlier?

He couldn’t say, really. But what was done had been done. Maybe he was trying to prove that he was a better person than Jenet was. Not like that was hard, but still. He should let the kid go hungry. Maybe it’d stop talking for once in its life.

Dante hurried after the bundle of energy he’d unleashed on the poor unsuspecting marketplace. The Prince had stopped by the fruits, the one thing most likely to make a huge mess if the wrong one was picked up. A fruity avalanche would be unleashed, probably to the Prince’s delight and Dante’s chagrin. It’d be an expensive fruity avalanche, too, because shopkeepers generally wanted return on their ruined products.

“Don’t touch anything,” he snapped. “If you want something, I’ll get it for you. Anyway.” He stopped, straightening his jacket for a moment. “Yes. That’s why the stuttering man came. He was too angry to speak right. And he was scared. You saw him. I bet if I’d gone on a little longer, he would have wet himself.” Dante laughed, remembering the little restaurant manager’s speech. He had been terrified, definitely! “So I decided to spare him the embarrassment and we left.”

The Prince was reaching for a pear just as Dante issued his stern order. The Prince snatched his hand back quickly and clamped his arms to his sides. "The Prince didn't touch anything!" he said, a little too loudly.

"But," he began a little sheepishly, "The Prince does want one of those." He pointed to the pears, making sure to keep a considerable distance between his hand and the actual fruit. Oh, The Prince so wanted to be good!

"So it was Dante's decision to leave, and not because the man asked him to! The Prince understands now, Dante was being considerate." Maybe The Prince was getting the wrong idea, but it did help to confirm his perhaps misguided assessment that Dante was a good person. In either case, The Prince was going to stick to his ideals for now.

He began to skip down the rows of food, stopping here or there to comment on something or other. "Oh, The Prince wants that!" "What's that? It looks good!" "The Prince never had that before!" "Pumpkins!" (For the record, they weren't actually pumpkins.)

[ ooc: I'm not sure if you want to move Dante onto the main plot or not. We can always summarize or come back to the thread later. ]

Dante carefully took a pear from the stand. Taking fruit was sometimes a finely-honed skill. An art, if you would. He plucked one from towards the top so the rest of the fruits would be as little disturbed as possible. He turned to give it to Prince but the little guy had already taken off. Dante scanned the area and saw the Prince bounding down another aisle. Damn.

This had the potential to be disastrous, so Dante hurried after him. “Hey, hey!” he called. “You gotta pick something, kid! You can’t have one of everything here! Pick three or four things you want and let’s get out of here already.” People were giving him strange looks. Did they think this twerp belonged to him? With the way Dante was hurrying after, they probably did. “Oh, and that’s not a pumpkin.”

Dante wondered how the Prince had so much energy. Kids usually did, but this was supposed to be a hungry kid. They got tired, slower, and crankier when they were hungry. How come this one seemed just as bouncy as ever? He’d never understand even if he spent lifetimes thinking on it. As he trailed the Prince, he took a few things for himself as well, putting everything in a bag he’d picked up along the way.

As to the Prince’s assessment of Dante being a considerate guy? He wasn’t about to correct that for anything. The last thing he needed was more waterworks from the kid.

At first The Prince was disappointed. He really had wanted to try everything! But this did give him the chance to look over everything and make careful decisions, a matter which took a great deal of time. He would have taken even longer if he could, but he didn't want to get Dante too irritated. Hey, The Prince took his food very seriously!

Eventually The Prince had picked out exactly what he wanted, pointing out each to Dante. He had picked out whatever he felt would taste best together. That wasn't hard to do in The Prince's case, since he would eat just about anything.

Finished, he bounced up and down on the balls of his feet, looking expectantly up at Dante. "The Prince wants to eat! Can we eat now?" If he could have, The Prince would have just sat down in the middle of the marketplace to eat, despite the people walking around. But he waited to see what Dante would decide, since he figured Dante wouldn't want to do that.

As the Prince pointed out each thing he wanted, Dante picked it up and put it in his bag. It got heavier and heavier as time went on. The Prince seemed to contemplate the meaning of life before settling on something he wanted, but it was better than him running up and down the aisles willy-nilly and demanding one of each.

And then the Prince looked up at him. He should have seen this question coming, he really should have. Dante closed his eyes for a moment, gathering his already stretched-thin patience. “Okay, kid. We can’t just eat here. You see any tables? A market isn’t somewhere you sit to chow down.” He moved down the aisles, talking to Prince as he went. “I have to pay for the food first. See the little tags?” He pointed to the signs above each stand that listed the price. “That’s how much I have to pay. Nothing here is free. I mean, a ride to jail is free, but I don’t think you want to do that at your age.”

Dante approached the lines where everyone was paying for their goods. Everyone else was very much blond and boring, so the view was nothing much. Dante chose the line with the shortest wait and hoped the Prince wouldn’t be bored. There were two people ahead of them, both with a decent amount of products to pay for. Maybe the kid would find the antique cash registers interesting. They pinged and made cool sounds as the operator used them. Dante hadn’t seen one of their like except for in movies. They were all phased out back in the city. He also saw scales, as they sold things by weight here. At least Prince didn’t choose too many heavy things.

Oh, The Prince understood to pay! He understood it very well! Well enough anyway, since he didn't usually pay for things. He just rolled them up. It wasn't his fault! When people just left things in the street, what else was he to do? Those Earth people were strange.

"The Prince likes rides! But he doesn't like jail," The Prince said in response to Dante. It was a toss-up. But The Prince decided that jail would be a bad deal. So it was best to pay!

As Dante went into a line to pay, The Prince looked around for a table. Sure, the cash registers were really cool, (They went ping and ba-ching and made little tapping noises from the keys, but The Prince wasn't thinking about that! He would not!) but Dante had given him a mission! Or something. Either way, The Prince was determined to find a table.

Unfortunately, The Prince's small stature made it almost impossible to see anything through the crowd of people. He looked this way, then that way, trying to get a clear view through the grove of people. He couldn't see the tables for the trees! Err, people, that is.

He had to get to higher ground. As luck may have it, the only high ground in front of him was the counters where people were buying their food. It would have to do! While the man at one counter was distracted by his customer, The Prince climbed up. However, he still wasn't quite high enough. The next highest place was the scale, so The Prince climbed right up on that too. He began to totter around on top of it. "Uh-oh." The scale began to creak. It probably wasn't used to his weight. Hopefully he didn't break it.

Dante slipped his hand inside his pocket to feel for how much money he had. Yep, he still had a decent amount, judging by how many coins he ran his fingers over. It was Pieshow currency too. He’d gotten change when he’d paid for the hotel rooms for himself and Lady. He wondered for a few moments how she was doing. He hadn’t heard from her in awhile. Neither journal entries or comments or anything of the like. She’d probably found a new group of people to hang out with. Probably with those exorcists or what the hell!

His thoughts were immediately derailed when he heard shouts and the creaking and clanging of metal. Dante looked up to see none other than the Prince, standing on top of the produce scale, though it clearly wasn’t built to hold more than the occasional plus-sized watermelon. “SHIT!”

Dante roughly pushed past the others waiting in line. He had taken his eye off the Prince for one minute, and he’d already gotten himself in trouble! If he broke that scale, who knew how much they’d be charged! “Dammit, Prince, what are you thinking!! Get the hell down from there!” The clerk was saying as much, too, though he was afraid to touch the Prince. Dante wasn’t, though. He reached up, took the Prince by the middle, and pulled him down from the scale, setting him on the ground again.

The clerk took a deep breath. Hopefully that unruly child had not broken his scale. He’d spent all morning working on balancing it just right. He had it perfectly calibrated with all the other scales in the entire store, too. He took a customer’s shiny red apple and placed it on the scale. He knew the average weight of an apple by heart. And the reading from the scale was definitely, definitely off. Apples didn’t weigh three pounds! The clerk tried not to spaz, and instead placed a ‘next register please’ sign in front of his counter, much to the chagrin of those already in his line.

Anger displaces quickly, and those who had been waiting turned to glare at Dante. Not at the Prince, but Dante. He had the privilege to hear such passive-aggressive wonders as, “Some people should never have children,” “If that kid were mine, I’d have kept him on a leash,” “My child would never have been so impolite as to pull such a stunt,” and, “Gee, thanks, buddy, your kid broke the scale and now we have to wait all over again in another line.”

Each comment made Dante’s apologetic smile stretch thinner and thinner. He had half a mind to tan the Prince’s hide, as someone suggested she would do to her child. But everything was going to be fine. He didn’t have to pay for any damage. He wasn’t going to break the Prince’s arm over a little mishap… though it would have been justified at this point.

But to make a good, solid impression on the kid, he bent down to Prince-level and looked him right in the eye. “All right, kid. What the fuck did you do that for?” he growled in a low voice. “You should know better than that! You’re lucky you didn’t do more damage than that, otherwise I would have left you here to fix it! Now come on.” He stood up and looked for a new line to wait in. “If you want to eat, you’ll wait quietly, right by my side, as the most silent, most well-behaved prince to ever set foot in this realm.” He settled on a new line, and this time, he kept a very close eye on the kid.

The Prince was in a ton of trouble and he knew it. Even so, he was quite relieved when Dante plucked him off the scale. After getting on top of it, he hadn't figured out how he was supposed to get down. Well, that solved one problem!

But he still hadn't found a table. Not that he had much time up there to look for one, and now didn't seem the time to look for one either. Dante was angry. Really, really angry. The Prince was beginning to rediscover his fear of the guy.

The Prince wasn't too young that he didn't understand the comments people were making about him. On a leash? Impolite? But, but, The Prince was just trying to do what he was told! Really he was!

He was in quite a mess by the time Dante bent down to talk to him. Dante's face being right in front of his own didn't help matters much. The Prince cringed and shrunk back from Dante's words. "But, but, The Prince was just trying to find Dante a table! He's not as tall as Dante, so he couldn't see through all those people. So The Prince just wanted to get high enough to see." The Prince didn't cry this time; he was too worn out from the whole ordeal.

The Prince did as he was told, standing quietly next to Dante in the line. He kept his eyes fixed to the ground, and didn't move an inch until Dante did. Right then he began to wish he was like Dante. Then he'd be tall and he would have to stand on top of scales to see over people. He'd also be strong and wouldn't have to rely on other people to protect him. (Especially if said people threatened to leave you alone in the worst part of the city.)

This kid was more trouble than he was worth. Trying to find a table? He’d told the kid explicitly that markets didn’t have tables, and they weren’t places to sit and eat. His clenched fist holding the produce bag closed showed just how thrilled he was. No wonder Jenet had taken off. No wonder Auron had taken off. This kid had no concept of reality, as far as he could tell. And those silly little third-person sentences were REALLY starting to irritate him.

At least the Prince listened to his words. He was behaving himself beautifully now. Dante was even able to pay for his goods without incident. The clerk of course gave him a dirty look, as did most of the other people in other lines, but finally the damn things were paid for and they were able to get out of the store. He’d been right. It was insanity to bring the Prince to this place. Maybe the city was finally getting to him. Or maybe it was a residual effect of that Green Dragon. Maybe it was just his own stupidity. Either way, he was not in a good mood as he stormed out of Matinal’s.

Now that they were outdoors, Dante had the perfect opportunity to give the Prince a piece of his mind. But he didn’t. The Prince was only quiet when he was eating, so Dante reached into his bag, found a fruit the Prince had picked out, and tossed it lightly to him. “We’ve got a long way to go, so eat up,” he said coldly, continuing away from the store.

The Prince was definitely behaving now. He would be the goodliest Prince there ever was! The damper to his spirit certainly helped with this, as he was more likely to make a mess when he was excitable.

His face burned as he felt people's eyes fell upon them. The Prince was usually not embarrassed by anything, but he could tell that he had really messed up this time. He was so very, very sorry! He wanted to say something to that effect, but he decided that wasn't the best idea. Probably wise on his part; he had done enough damage that day and Dante didn't look in the least bit pleased.

The Prince remained silent as they left the marketplace and went off to eat. He absently caught the fruit Dante had thrown to him, rolling it around on the palm of his hand. He wasn't very hungry anymore. It wasn't until Dante told him to eat that The Prince did so. He had to eat and grow big and strong and... and... well, it didn't really matter right now.

Before the incident, The Prince might have asked Dante where the "long way to go" was, but The Prince kept the question to himself. Wherever Dante was going to go The Prince would go too, regardless of whether either of them wanted to be together.

[ooc: Man, I'm sorry that took so long! I really have no excuse, other than it's been pretty busy for me lately. Still, I'm really sorry, I had no right to make you wait that long. I think we can end on this note, yes?]

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Stuck With The Weird [complete]

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